How long should it take me to have an orgasm? (This question is usually asked by women, so the answer will be aimed at them.)

There is a lot of variation in the time it takes women to reach orgasm. This will depend on:

  1. How aroused you are at the start
  2. The type of stimulation being used
  3. How engaged you are in the process
  4. How well you know your body
  5. Possible medical factors

Some women can reach orgasm in a minute or two, on average it takes at least 15 minutes of stimulation. Only about half of all heterosexual women can reach orgasm during intercourse and for most of those, the woman on top position or the CAT (coital alignment technique) are the most successful position to provide enough clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm.

Some women and a few men have never experienced an orgasm. There can be lots of reasons for this including a lack of understanding about what is required, childhood messages about sexuality and a lack of confidence and ease with sexual matters. Lots of books have been written on this subject but you are likely to find it more productive to seek the guidance of a sex therapist.

Frequently Asked Questions - click question for information